MERRY CHRISTMAS YOU LITTLE SHITS.
me avoiding my responsibilities
Holly snow balls! Awesome Zelda Snow Sculpures.
i can’t even make a snowball wtf
if i could change 2 things about the world, gunpowder never would of been invented and everyone would know kung fu
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stop tagging your hate. we don’t want to hear about how you think he shouldn’t be paired with eisenhower. this is the #ronald reagan feels tag and we won’t take any of your shit
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i’m five years old
everyone on here is obsessed with the actors from superhashballs and psychiatrist when. couldn’t they at least obsess over 1980’s Kurt Russel, from The Thing and Escape from new york? That’d be a site for sore eyes.
Seriously when did blendeddick cumperbatch become hotter than snake plissken
i’m sorry i got distracted what was i talking about
This is Doreen Green, a fourteen-year-old character who featured in a few Marvel issues in 1992.
For obvious reasons, she goes by the handle “Squirrel Girl.”
Let me tell you a little about Miss Green.
In her first appearance, she attempts to befriend Iron Man and become his new sidekick. However, because Tony Stark is not in the habit of hanging out with girls who look kind of like rodents, he turns her down. Shortly thereafter, Stark was captured by Doctor Doom… who was then handily defeated by Squirrel Girl.
Squirrel Girl’s hit list so far is:
- Doctor Doom (Genius dictator known for defeating the Silver Surfer and stealing the power cosmic)
- Mandarin (Master hand-to-hand fighter possessing ten magic rings giving him powers ranging from blasts of ice to completely rearranging matter.)
- Giganto (Giant walking whales known for defeating the Fantastic Four and the Avengers.)
- MODOK (Ridiculously intelligent mutagenic with advanced psionic powers.)
- Thanos (Titanian Eternal with superhuman strength, speed, intellect, near-indestructable skin, and psionic blasts.)
- Terrax (The next herald of Galactus, who has control over the classical elements.)
- Bug-Eyed Voice (Street level criminal, beaten senseless by Green after messing with the guy she was crushing on.)
- Bi-Beast (Giant android possessing enhanced strength, endurance, durability, and intelligence.)
- Deadpool (Fricking DEADPOOL.)
- Pluto (The Olympian god of the bloody underworld.)
- Fin Fang Foom (Known as “He whose limbs shatter mountains and whose back scrapes the sun.”)
- Baron Mordo (Powerful magician, skilled hypnotist, and summoner of demons.)
- Korvac (Wielder of the power cosmic)
- Ego the Living Planet (A. LIVING. PLANET.)
- Wolverine (You know who Wolverine is. You freaking know who Wolverine is.)
Marvel Comics’ official database uses a system they call the “powergrid” to measure the abilites of their characters.
The grid measures six characteristics (intelligence, strength, speed, durability, energy projection, and fighting skills) on a scale of one through seven.
Squirrel Girl got straight sevens.
According to the Marvel Wiki, this means she:
- …is near-omniscient.
- …can lift upwards of 100 tons.
- …can transcend light speed.
- …cannot be harmed or destroyed.
- …has unlimited command of all energy forms.
- …is a master of every combat style.She is fourteen years old, and has already
trumped the efforts ofworked alongside Iron Man and S.H.I.E.L.D.Also, she can speak squirrel.That is all.EDIT: For those of you asking where I got the straight sevens thing, it’s from Marvel’s official website.
Hey, remember the time Squirrel Girl kicked Wolverine’s ass?
Hey, remember the time Squirrel Girl kicked Deadpool’s ass?
Hey, remember the time Squirrel Girl beat the shit out of the living personification of death itself?
Hey, remember the time when Doctor Fucking Doom was scared of Squirrel Girl?
Because I sure do. :D
THEORETICAL FIGHTONOMICS IS A REAL SCIENCE DANG IT
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I just wrote something on why I believe Mr. Krabs from spongebob could beat Eddy from Ed Edd and Eddy in a fight.
This is what my life has come too.
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